Cultural Differences

Three weeks is probably long enough to make broad generalizations about a country. They say that the Danes are the happiest people in the world. I say this is because the Danes, unlike the New Yorkers, will gladly accept anything and everything that comes their way.

As if dealing with 70% taxes, obnoxious local celebrities like Hans Christian Andersen, and irritatingly constant obeying of pedestrian rules wasn't enough, I decided to run my own social experiment on the people of Denmark. Target test group: bus drivers.

This is how the public transportation system in Denmark works:
1) Leave home. Walk through cloudy streets.
2) Stop at every red light, despite obvious lack of approaching cars.
3)Have life threatened by bikers.
4)Board immaculately clean S-tog, Metro, or bus.
5)Pay for ride**.
6)Exit at stop.

**In the case of S-tog and Metro, MetroPasses aren't required. They operate on an honor system, where obedient Danes purchase a ticket to the zone they are going to (20-100 kroners), and wait, hoping a ticket checker will come check their ticket. In my time here, I have encountered one ticket checker. I had the wrong ticket. Cayla and Ali had none. We got away with it.

The bus is a whole other story. The bus operates like any normal public transportation system would. Passenger boards. Passenger shows MetroPass. Passenger sits. Other passengers continue in same fashion. Except for the social experiment. Over the course of the past two weeks, I have been deliberately refraining from showing bus drivers my MetroPass. I simply board, flash my Lost-American smile, and sit. This may sound silly, since I have a 2 Zone bus pass and take the bus at least once every day, however, I am still waiting for a bus driver to stop me and actually ask me for my identification and payment. It hasn't happened.

In Manhattan, if you boarded the bus without swiping your MetroCard, the large African American, Latino, or Eastern European (like my immigrant family. Who's a racist now?) bus driver would do one of two things.
1)Kick your white girl ass out onto the curb.
2)Grab your arm and force you to scrounge up change in all the pockets of your purse and clothing, ask strangers for additional change, and scowl ferociously at you when you only come up with $1.93.

So my theory: Danes are the happiest people on Earth because they will do whatever the f you tell them to. Being extravagantly bossy is #3 on my list of spectacular talents (blowing smoke rings, being middle spoon), so this country should work out rather well for me.